Monday, July 21, 2008

Prayer request

Awhile back, I asked you all to pray for me as I've been going thru some health difficulties. I'd like to ask you to continue praying as I fill you in on some detail.

Right now, I'm being screened for multiple schlorosis (MS). I have many of the symptoms for it, including lots of itchiness, temperature sensitivity (anything cooler than 68 or so and in the upper 70s and higher), some numbness in my arms, extreme fatigue, unexplained shaking, fumbling fingers and sometimes footsteps, and much more. As I'm typing, I'm experiencing some shaking right now and it is FRUSTRATING!!! Right now, it is just some trembling mainly in my hands, but a few weeks back, it went into full fledge shaking, mainly in my upper body, non-stop for over 2.5 hours until I fell asleep.

My doctor did several blood tests to rule out other potential problems, including Lyme's disease, and they all came back clean. An MRI also came back clean, although MS shows up in MRIs about 90% of the time. She said I have too many symptoms to let things go, so I am scheduled to see a neurologist on August 1.

I don't understand what is happening or why, but I continue to trust that God knows and understands and will take care of me. In a way, I'm understanding some of what Job must have been feeling, not knowing why. I pray that my faith and trust continue to be unwaivering as the doctors continue to try and figure out what is wrong.

Things get really bad when I don't get the rest I need -- like today when I had to work a full day at the market. We've hired extra help so I don't need to be in as much, but there are still times when I have to be there. Things also get bad when temperatures get too warm or too cool, like when we went out to eat last week and the air conditioning in the restaurant was very cold. It triggered a spell, and I spent the time laying down in the car while Tony and the kids enjoyed their meal.

Tony has been a gem thru this all. In our busiest time of the year, he has been doing not only his round-the-clock work, but also has taken over many times with the kids, cleaning house, and more. What a man!

Just pray for me. Pray for us. I get discouraged when this happens. For four days I've felt great; no negative affects or anything, even thru today. But after started again. I'm sad. And yet, I'm listening to some great praise music to keep my focus on my Father.

I'd no intention of sharing all this until we found out more, but I'm to the point where I really need prayers to get thru each day. I really need prayers for encouragement. I am learning more and more to set limits and keep them; to say no when I have too much going on, and to turn more and more things over to people just as capable as I am and sometimes even more than I! God has been so good in providing helpers and prayer warriors...and I hope that I can include each of my readers as prayer warriors.

I look at some of the things that God has either removed from my life in the past year or so or laid on my heart to step back from, and I am so thankful! Before I knew, He knew that certain things were going to be too much. We have an awesome team of employees at our Market, and I know beyond any doubt that He put that team in place so that I don't need to worry about how things are going when I'm not there...that I could take the extra time off that I need when things like this start happening. I'll most likely spend most or all of tomorrow in bed or on the pray that the kids will be cooperative. When I get the extreme fatigue and other symptom, just their general actions as preschoolers is often too much for me to deal with. Pray about that, too, would ya?

It's times like these that I start wondering...I want God to completely heal me of all this...but I want His will done, too. Am I doubting God's healing touch if I also am praying that He will help me deal with this and accept it, whatever it is? Am I showing a lack of faith? So much runs thru my mind....

But now...I need to go lay down. Thanks for your prayers.


Martha said...

I can pray with understanding because I went through that same thing over several years since no one could conclude anything! It's frustrating, but thank the Lord, my symptoms have subsided and there are no more tests scheduled because they can't seem to find anything. The preschooler thing I can also pray with understanding!! I'm right there with you on that one! :) I'll pray that at your Aug. 1 appointment you will be able to find some answers.

precious grandma said...

I feel for both you and Martha as I went through the same experience years ago. I even started writing down my feelings of "Why ME" and came to the conclusion that if someone in MY family had to have MS it had to be me for various reasons, all of which the Lord showed me. AND through it all He helped me accept it and learn to live with it. Thanks be to His gracious love for me, and the prayers of those I love, I do quite well. But I also have to bo my part and take care of my health as well. Rest, Rest, Rest. and learning to say NO! What hard lessons to learn, but well worth it! You are all in my prayers. With much love.

liz said...

I have been praying and I will continue. God is in this, even though it is difficult. You have always allowed Him to shine through your life circumstances and that brings glory to Him. Love you.