Hard to believe I've been home almost a week now! Okay, since my last update, here's what's been going on:
I was scheduled to go home from the hospital Sunday afternoon and was really looking forward to it! But I woke up Sunday feeling quite muddle-headed, really out of it. The nurses actually woke me at 8:00 and I fell asleep again only to have them wake me again at 10:00. As I was in the restroom a few minutes later, I started shaking on the right side, first my hand then arm then everything on the right side...couldn't talk without stuttering...and that quickly got worse, too. The nurse got me back to bed and then doctors started coming in. I couldn't stop shaking and the stuttering just got worse where I could barely speak...but I was thinking clearly (albeit wondering what in the world was happening to me). The internal medicine doctor came and told them to get me off all the narcotics and soon after a psych intern came and started asking me all kinds of questions. I fell asleep again, it was around 1:00, and when I woke up about two hours later, the shaking was gone and the stuttering was just about gone....then the head of the psych department came. Meanwhile, they had started me on two different pain meds, Celebrex (anti-inflammatory) and Tramadol (pain). I felt NO pain (still had pain with the narcotics). After a 30-minute or so talk with the psych guy, he told me it was one of three things: medication, anxiety, or trauma. Well, DUH! I asked him if HE thought I was crazy and he told me based on our talk, he believes I'm clearly sane (so THERE!)....and seemed to lean towards the meds.
It was scary...not knowing what was going on, wondering if I was having a stroke or worse. Thankfully, it does seem like everything cleared up when the meds were changed...and honestly, the new combo works much better. So much better in fact, that I overdid it that night. Tony and the kids came to visit, and before they got there, I took what to me was a long walk, sat in the chair for 90 minutes when they were there, then had that leg thingy on that bends my knee for me -- for over an hour at a pretty high angle. No pain...but then the exhaustion hit!
After having a good morning on Monday, the doctor confirmed that I could go home finally...I'd been there for a full week! It was a rough ride home -- 90 minutes in a pretty uncomfortable position but no way to get more comfortable. What I've come to realize even more this week is that this is going to be a loooooong healing process! It was good to be home, familiar surroundings, see the kids, and settle in. Thankfully, going down stairs is easier than going up, and I'm settled downstairs for a few weeks.
One benefit (?) to the pain I had in the hospital and problems with medications is that I was authorized to have home health care, so a therapist comes in three times a week and I have three nurse visits over the first two weeks I'm home. That isn't usual, so I'm very thankful to have it.
It's been a very humbling week for me. I didn't realize just how traumatic this would be to my body physically. While I don't have alot of pain any more, each day is getting better, the simplest things wear me out beyond exhaustion. I've been in tears many times because walking to the bathroom, a very short distance, makes me so physically tired. A few days, I've had to get lunch for the kids, and being on my feet for ten short minutes makes me hurt and tired beyond belief. The kids have been fairly understanding through this, but it's hard on them, too. By Thursday, we were all ready for a break, and I thank God for my home school friend Sara who called to see what I needed. I told her I need my kids out of the house, occupied, distracted, something! So she brought her twins (right between Luke & Susanna's ages) over the next day along with lunch. The kids went crazy, and she helped my dear friend Diane who had come over to help with house keeping. And overall, the kids have been doing well, trying to help, make me feel better, things like that. My first day home, Susanna spent two hours painting my nails...with literally 15 different colors. They're quite interesting.... She also loves to rub lotion on my feet and give me "foot massages." She's my "ice" girl, getting ice packs when I need them, and Luke is my "foot boy," helping put my foot on the couch or pillow when I can't lift it. They love to get me things to drink, and when I'm on my feet getting meals for them, they'll bring the food over to me since I can't get it myself.
My poor husband. He's been trying his best to keep up with general things around the house along with everything at the farm. There are times we go several days with dishes piling up in the kitchen...I can't walk without the walker, and I can't stand/move for any length of time, so I can't get the dishes stacked or unloaded from the dish washer. With my limited movement and the walker, I can't even get into the laundry room! Luke has been complaining that he's running out of clean underwear!
When Diane came over Friday to help clean, she took one look at my kitchen and said "well, I guess I'll be starting on the dishes!" Then she turned around and said "and the laundry as well!" She got so much accomplished, and between her and Sara, the house (or at least the basement...although I'm sure upstairs is good, too!) looks so much better. That helps me relax more, because I go crazy looking at the things piling up in the kitchen and on the carpet..then get up and try to do things and end up even more worn out! I'm also thankful for my in-laws who have done some grocery shopping for us, and my dear sister-in-law who brought McDonald's for us...and got some birthday presents for the party the kids are going to. Another sister-in-law brought me Chinese food today, yum!
Yes, I now realize my limitations, and I am going to push to the point of where my therapist thinks I should...but not beyond. There is no way I want to go thru knee surgery again any time soon!
I am thankful, too, for those who have been providing meals for us. Between three suppers brought to us each week and friends every once in awhile dropping by with lunch, it has really given me relief as I don't have to worry so much about taking care of meals for my family.
On a totally different subject, I am so thankful our pumpkin parties have been doing well. Last week, we had a record turn out for a non-MEA weekend (MEA is a weekend in Minnesota where all the schools are closed for three days; it is our busiest Saturday of the year). This week was even better. I ache wanting to be at the market, helping with the pumpkin parties, talking with customers, seeing my kiddos working in the wagon ride skits (yes, both of them are in the skit this year!). I miss seeing Tony playing the banjo, launching the pumpkin propeller, and just the crowds in general. But again, I am very thankful God provided us with such excellent employees. I started crying today when I talked with Andy Thompson, thanking him for all his work. Between him, Barb Melheim, Bria Wolff, and Joy Haataja, they've been keeping up with everything at the market, especially on Saturdays. Kelly Schanelic has been doing his usual wonderful job in the concession stand. With them working, I honestly am not worried about how things are going, if things are falling behind, whatever. They've been keeping up with everything wonderfully! And Tony has a great crew in the back, too.
Sometime in the next week, I'll try to start uploading some photos that have been accumulating over the past year. I'll also try to post photos of the lovely flowers I've received from my in-laws Paul and Lori, Al and Carla, Beth, and my friends Barb and Diane. We've got quite the collection going downstairs! Susanna has informed me that any flowers I don't want, she'll gladly take for me...and when I'm tired of the balloons, she'll gladly take those, too!
Thank you all for the continued prayers. Keep 'em coming...they're valued, treasured, and needed! I'm also not able to get emails right now as our main computer with the emails are upstairs...so if you send me an email and don't hear back, you'll know why!